Taking Suggestions for The Devil’s Tax Return

Chris-icon

Hey there, Pouch Pals. The IRS just bestowed upon me my 2012 tax return. Guess how much? $666. $666!

What a nefarious sum of money! With this money I could do any number of things…

-Start a cult.

-Snipe some Southwest Air tickets to hell (just to check it out).

-Donate money to the local Girl Scout Troupe.

-Fund a low-budget porno.

-Fund a high-budget home video (personal porno).

-Gamble. Gamble. Gamble.

-Skywrite awful things about three peoples’ mothers.

-Produce a mastered recording of a tourism song, directing people to scenic, totally
safe, Chernobyl.

And maybe I’ve been hanging out with Brandon for too long, but none of this seems adequate. I feel like there is something better, something obvious that I’m missing.

Come on, Pouch Pals. What do I do with The Devil’s Tax Return?

-Christ!

(Do I use it to pay rent next month, and instead of going to work I stay home and finish the screenplay: The Devil’s Tax Return?)

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3 Responses to Taking Suggestions for The Devil’s Tax Return

  1. Dave D says:

    Wait until Christmas. Go to a popular toy store. Buy out everyone of a single type of toy. Throw all in the dumpster. Deny children toys

  2. Dave D says:

    Spend it all on explicit thai massages

  3. Lightning Comet says:

    Spend it all on burritos and then poop on Brandon.

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