Things You Shouldn’t Say/Shout Out While Fucking #4

Catheter play, catheter play, whaddaya say, catheter play.

Soup du jour.

I cheated on my AIDS test.

I’m Jimmy Buffet.

Anal polyps.

Let’s play “what can I fit in you.”

Why do you smell like my brother?

The Holocaust.

Tell me you think ex-cons are sexy or I’ll slit your throat.

Do those warts feel good inside you?

You fuck like the Michelin Man.

You fuck like my mom.

You fuck like my mom, the Michelin Man.

-Our Hero

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This entry was posted in Gospels, Our Hero, Things You Shouldn't Say. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Things You Shouldn’t Say/Shout Out While Fucking #4

  1. Christ! says:

    Our Hero only posts content of this nature when it has been field-tested. Thus, we can all conclude these are proven to be patently bad pillow-talk conversation starters. We cannot take responsibility for what may happen if you attempt any of the preceding sexual remarks.

    I would add to this list, “it’s like pesto.”

  2. Sully says:

    Plan to use the last one. Will let the Jones family know how it goes.

  3. Mon says:

    “Prostate cancer!!”

    “Have you accepted Christ?”

    “Bear Trap”

    We’ll think of more.

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